Valentines day is coming and love is in the air! But after all the roses have withered and the heart-shaped chocolates have been eaten, real life is established. Being in love is magical. But it is not always easy. Money is, unfortunately, one of the most common causes of relationship problems. Debt, in particular, can be contentious in relationships. But is debt a decisive factor in the relationship?
How much debt is too much debt?
The answer to whether debt is a decisive factor may be different for everyone. To determine your own answer, consider thinking about a series of questions. Asking yourself how much debt is too much for your partner can be an important factor to consider. For most of us, debt is part of life. Therefore, you can agree that your partner has a debt. With that, there may be a threshold that you don't find comfortable crossing. However, that threshold may not really be a quantitative number. It can be related to your partner's assets or, even more abstractly, if they seem to be managing it effectively. You may also feel more comfortable with certain types of debt than others. For example, you may not be as worried about the student loan debt that your partner borrowed to get a high quality education as you would be with the massive amounts of credit card debt. Considering what the debt looks like in your partner's life can help you determine what you feel comfortable with.
Is the debt indicative of other personality traits?
In many cases, charging substantial amounts of debt or managing it poorly can have underlying causes. Sometimes, debt can be the result of excessive spending or living beyond the means. This can often be related to addictive personalities. Or, more simply, if your partner became indebted simply by not paying attention to their charges, this could be indicative of a lack of financial education, complacency or disorganization. Also, if your partner has been hiding debts, he becomes defensive if he mentions her or refuses to talk about everything, you may want to consider what that means for your partner, as well as for you and your relationship. While you may not want to actively seek negative traits in your partner, understanding that debt can be a warning sign for other parts of your partner's personality can help you avoid further headaches in the future.
What's the plan?
Your partner's debt will probably seem like a major obstacle if your partner doesn't seem to be doing anything (or even thinking about doing something) about it. However, on the other hand, if your partner has a plan to get out of debt and seems to be taking the necessary steps to achieve it, you may feel more confident in your understanding of the situation and want to improve. In some cases, your partner may want to have a plan but does not know where to start. Communication between them about these problems can be productive to help them decide their comfort with the situation.
Will it affect our future goals?
Substantial amounts of debt can have lasting and far-reaching impacts. The debt can affect the borrower's ability to qualify for a mortgage, a car loan and new credit cards, just to name a few. If you dream of starting a family, owning a home or buying a new car in the near future, your partner's debt could prevent both of you from achieving your goals. Debt can also affect the planning of a wedding if you two are financing the wedding (or even wedding parties) on your own. It is important to consider how you feel about having to delay your plans or take on more financial responsibility yourself.
Am I responsible for the debt?
In most cases, you are only legally responsible for your partner's debt if you are a joint or co-signer account holder. However, in community-owned states (Louisiana, Arizona, California, Texas, Washington, Idaho, Nevada, New Mexico and Wisconsin), any debt you accumulate as a married couple is the same responsibility of both parties, even if the debt is only In the name of a person. For married couples seeking divorce in any other state, the liability of any joint debt is determined in divorce proceedings. However, in the eyes of the creditor, accounts that have the names of both partners are the joint responsibility of both partners. Therefore, even if one couple has been held liable in the divorce process, the other couple will be negatively affected if the debts are not being paid. In addition, in the unfortunate case of your partner's debt, you will be responsible for paying it if you are co-signer (not a joint account holder) in any of the deceased person's accounts. While it may seem bleak to think about divorce and death, knowing how your partner's debts could affect you in the worst case can help you determine how comfortable you feel with the situation.
Can we solve it together?
In no way the debt to have Be a decisive factor if you have thought about it and accepted the situation. Many relationships can absolutely resist the challenges of debt. It can be your partner's support system while working through your debt. This does not mean that you should provide financial support if you are not comfortable doing so. But you can provide support and emotional guidance, if your partner is open to it. As with any obstacle in relationships, the most important thing is to be open and honest with each other about your feelings and concerns. By creating a dialogue and productive collaboration, working through debt could actually strengthen your relationship instead of destroying it.
Love and money tend to go hand in hand, for better or worse. Having a partner that has a considerable amount of debt certainly has the potential to press a relationship in several ways. Therefore, it is up to you to determine what that means to you. When it comes to your relationship, only you can respond if the debt will be a decisive factor.
Did we provide the information you needed? If not, let us know and we will improve this page.
Let us know if you liked the post. That is the only way we can improve.